Run For Your Life
Starring Ben Gazzara



Paul Bryan's Journal
27 June - 3 July 1966

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27 June - 3 July 1966 ("A Very Small Injustice")

Journal Entry
Chronology of Events
Crescent Lake
Monday, June 27

I was ready to head for Europe - anywhere but have the peace and quiet we'd come here for. This whole day I haven't been able to do anything - neither fish, nor write, nor even to talk things over with Kate.
The reality I've been trying to pretend didn't exist came and hit me so hard that I wonder if I'll ever get back to that safe place I've been hiding out. Bill Dagen found out nine months after I did, and the “at least nine months” was all he had.
Kate has suggested that we pack up tomorrow, and head for Santa Margarita, and I think that's what we should have done this morning.



Paul and Kate have gone to Louisiana for a few days of quiet fishing.

Crescent Lake - in flight to France
Tuesday - Thursday, June 28 - 30

Trying to pull myself together, I'd gotten up early with the idea of bringing Kate some rainbow trout for breakfast. Then the world caved in under me - again, and I have the injuries to prove it was all too real.
J. B. Flowers thought that I was going to be the man to give him cover to escape over the border, but after dragging me all day across field and water, pursued by dogs and posses, when we arrived at his girlfriend's house, it turned out to be his place of death rather than path to freedom.
Another person who came close to me, but has preceded me into eternity. The pain I'm feeling for this unfortunate human, wrongly imprisoned in what the sheriff called “a very small injustice,” then taken along by a killer to make a prison break, he was a very mixed up lad who never had a chance at life.
Though, at times, I thought him either insane or backward, in the end I came to think of him as someone I would do anything to help.  And I would have. The doctor has looked at my leg, but says it's nothing serious. I was starting to think of things like gangrene, so low my spirits have sunk.
The shoulder wound is a little more serious, he says, but I'm determined to get out of here as quickly as possible. What I hadn't realized was that for a lot of the time we were on the run, the law were ready to shoot me on sight - believing that I was the man who escaped with JB.
It seems like a dream now, but there was a horrible moment when I felt like Bill Dagen was reaching out a hand to me when a farmer began shooting at us, and then JB shot the handcuff from my wrist.
I just keep reliving that moment over and over in consciousness and in sleep, sometimes the farmer an elephant charging me, others one being JB, bludgeoning my handcuffed wrists with his trunk.
The Wynters couldn't have been nicer, offering loving hospitality, and having been a great support to Katie when I was kidnapped. But I couldn't take another minute of this place, and as soon as a new car was delivered, we took off for the airport.
All the sedation and medication didn't have the expected effect, and I'm like walking around in a dream. Extremely fearful. That Kate and I can't seem to reach one another seems the worst part. Asleep and then frighteningly awake again, this has been a nightmare of a flight.

Paul is taken hostage by a young man who has just escaped from prison. A man hunt goes out for both of them when it is believed for a while that Paul is one of the pair who has broken out of prison and killed a guard. Handcuffed together, they travel over difficult terrain with dogs in pursuit. Paul's leg is injured, and he finds it difficult to go on. Later his shoulder is grazed, and he has a second injury to deal with when a farmer shoots at the two men when they are using his water pump.

Paul had been handcuffed to the pump to make sure he couldn't get away, and when he asked to have the cuff switched to his other, less sore hand, the opportunity is seized, and Paul throws the key into the well. Determined that Paul will remain with him, the young man shoots the cuff from the pump, and Paul nearly loses his hand. Despite this tension, Paul slowly develops a friendship with the man, and when they reach his girl friend's home, Paul tells the man that he was probably wrongly sentenced, and would go free after a new trial, having already served five years.

The idea  is to get him to turn himself in to the lawmen outside, but Paul is sincere. When the man does come out, he is shot, and kills three others.
Reims
Friday, July 1

There was no possibility of even getting into the car, much less driving it, and that hurt, as I'd made up my mind that this would be my last race as test driver.
Everyone was incredibly kind. Clive seemed dazzled and uncomprehending when he learned what had happened, as if having to live through it himself. Rhona's hug was so warm that I was ready to cry.
Only Pete made little of it, with an off hand remark about the scrapes I got into, but Kate said later he'd told her that he'd gone through hell, waiting for news about me.
Jack seemed embarrassed and confused, but I told him sincerely how grateful we had been for all the support and kindness his parents had given both of us.
Then there was Armand. I was too weak to resist when he showed up with his personal physician to look after me. Dr. Soule frowned when he looked at what I was taking, and gave me something which improved my spirits remarkably.
And the soreness and pain in my leg and shoulder seemed to melt away, and when Kate and I had dinner in our suite, all of a sudden, after dessert, she was suddenly there again as a human presence, not someone who was making me uncomfortable. I even feel well enough to join the others in the bar for some pre-race chat.

Traumatized, Paul is treated for his injuries, and after making his statement to police, he and Kate fly to France where their Formula 1 team are participating in the French Grand Prix at Reims.
Reims
Saturday, July 2

Feeling no pain in more than one sense of the word, I was able to cheer with real heart when Pete qualified sixth on the grid for tomorrow's race. But aside from that, on doctor's orders, I spent the rest of the day in bed.
Not the only one under doctor's care, and I intend to go see Jim Clark tomorrow. We're all worried about his eye after the unbelievable attack from a bird during qualifying.

Recovering quickly under medication, Paul watches Pete Gaffney qualify well for the race.

Reims
Sunday, July 3

Feeling almost normal, went to see Jim, and he assured me he was going to be fine. Like a lot of people here, he's very down and sentimental, as this is going to be the last Formula 1 race at Reims. He reminisced about driving here - as did many others who talked about the myths and legends of Reims.

Later

Ninth, but we finished. We cheered Pete as if he had won, and I rededicated myself to finding joy in whatever life was still mine to have.
That Katie and I have been able to talk again in depth has had much to do with my getting back to this point. Just knowing that she is there helps even with things we haven't discussed.


4 - 10 July 1966 ("A Dangerous Proposal"  /
"Our Man in Limbo" dream)
The team finishes its first race of the season.